Season 8, Episode 21, “Leap of Faith”

Pre-Credits Gag:  Jesse comes home late after Motocross racing with his friends and Becky is pissed because she was all worried about him, what with Motocross being hella dangerous and all.  He’s like, “I never gave a shit about how you felt before, and I’m not about to start now.  It’s like that, and that’s the way it is.”  He explains to her about how taking risks makes him feel alive but then their conversation is cut short because the twins clog up the toilet by flushing some nondescript item down it.

As the family all sit around watching Jerry Springer, Joey comes in and gives Stephanie and DJ tickets to the Counting Crows concert.  Counting Crows, huh?  Haven’t heard much about those guys in a while…could they be yet another casualty of being name-dropped on Full House?

Michelle overhears that Stephanie and DJ were given tickets to a concert and she’s like, “why don’t I get to go to the concert?  DON’T YOU ALL UNDERSTAND THAT EVERYTHING IS ALL ABOUT ME, ALL OF THE TIME!??!”  Danny explains that she, like the majority of America, doesn’t even like the Counting Crows, but Michelle insists that she’s totally a fan.  I know that I’ve been listing reasons what I hate Michelle for years now, but I think my intolerance of her can actually be wholly summarized by this fucking shitty face that she makes at least once an episode.

You can’t tell me that you don’t want to punch that face.

Danny decides that it would only be fair to give Michelle a chance to snake some tickets to a concert that she doesn’t even care about from her sisters who really want to go, so he makes them draw straws.  Stephanie gets the short straw, which is almost like a metaphor for her whole character or something.  Danny starts telling DJ about all of the new responsibilities she has now that she’s bringing her stupid little baby sister to the concert and then, when DJ complains, he explains to her that life isn’t always fair.  But wasn’t the whole pretense for making the girls draw straws that it was the only way to make things fair?  So why does that have to be fair, but this other thing doesn’t?  Can’t he at least be honest and admit that fairness isn’t the issue and it’s really all just about accommodating what a piece of shit Michelle is?  Why does the lesson have to be convoluted by false morality?  I’m starting to think that Full House might not be a very good show.

After Danny leaves the scene, Michelle admits that she’s never even heard of the Counting Crows, and Stephanie and DJ get super pissed.  They decide that, since no precedent has ever been set for honesty and they can’t just use logic or straightforwardness to resolve the situation, they’d better cook up a zany scheme to get Michelle to give up her ticket.

As Joey and Jesse sit around the house getting ready to watch Wake Up, San Francisco, I couldn’t help but wonder if they’re supposed to be unemployed again.  Did they lose their radio DJ jobs?  Why else would they be just sitting around eating and watching tv in the middle of the day?

The show’s guest is “the bungee jumping grandma” because I guess they couldn’t score any actual celebrities. They watch a video of her most recent bungee jump and it almost seems like they used a really obvious stunt double on purpose to be funny, but they totally didn’t.  Becky becomes inspired by the stunt footage and starts talking about how her husband might be right about the importance of taking risks even though the audience of Wake Up, San Francisco would have no reference for what she’s talking about.  The bungee jumping grandma invites Becky and Danny to do a jump with her and Danny outright refuses but Becky’s all about that shit, which makes Jesse, who’s still watching at home, feel perturbed.

When Becky gets home, Jesse straight up forbids her to go bungee jumping.  She asks why it’s ok for him to take careless risks and not her and he’s like, “haven’t you been paying attention to anything that’s happened during our entire relationship?  I do whatever I want and I don’t care about how you feel at all.  Your needs are irrelevant.  Go make me a sandwich.”

Becky decides that she wants to actually have some dignity for the first time sine her tragic wedding day and tells Jesse to go suck a dick because she’s totally going bungee jumping whether he likes it or not.  You go, girl!

DJ and Stephanie put on their winter coats and crank up the heat in the full house in order to create a ruse to convince Michelle that she has some weird disease.  They tell her that it’s super cold in the house and she only feels hot because it’s one of her symptoms and then they make her get in bed before showing her a mirror with spots drawn all over it to convince her that she’s covered in them.  I’m not even going to elaborate on why that gag doesn’t make any sense.

DJ and Stephanie convince Michelle that she has this made up disease and that she has to stay in bed and not tell Danny about it and then Kimmie Gibbler comes in and almost fucks it all up but in the end they succeed at suckering Michelle out of her Counting Crows ticket.

As DJ and Stephanie make their way out the door, Michelle delivers this incredibly contrived speech about how she only swindled Stephanie’s ticket out of her because she looks up to her older sisters so much and wants to be just like them.  DJ and Stephanie are effectively manipulated and admit that they made up the whole illness because they wanted the ticket back and then DJ offers to take Michelle after all.  Michelle insists that Stephanie should go in her place and then the three of them agree to do some fun activity together the following week for the sake of sisterly bonding.  Seriously, though, a 2-minute-long straightforward conversation could have averted this entire situation.  And who had the idea to convince Michele that she had some obscure disease as a solution?  Even for a zany scheme that’s quite a stretch.  Oh well.  At least it’s over.

As Becky is leaving for work, Jesse rushes downstairs in his bathrobe (a nice detail alluding to how he has no job or responsibilities) and tries once again to convince her not to bungee jump.  He says that he understands that she’s just doing it to get back at him for taking unnecessary risks all the time without considering how they effect her but she tells him that she’s actually doing it because she never takes any risks herself and wants to try and live a little.  Jesse is unable to comprehend how Becky’s actions aren’t entirely based on responding to his own behavior and then he continues to try to convince her not to do the jump.  She tells him that he doesn’t understand her and walks out of the house, which is kind of awesome, although it would be much more so if that meant that they were getting a divorce.  I can’t think of a better wrap up for this series than these two getting divorced.  Oh yeah, also, if Joey died.

Jesse seeks counsel from Joey, who tells him that he’s worried about Becky because her life means more to him than his own, which is total nonsense.  I refuse to believe for one second that Jesse cares about anything in the world more than himself.  That’s, like, the whole basis of his character.  I also always find it deeply unsettling when Joey steps in as the voice of reason.

Becky prepares for the bungee jump right after the next commercial break and then they cut to a wide shot that shows the whole crew.  Since when does Wake Up, San Francisco have a crew?  Based on the production value of the series, what with the constant bungling and all, I always assumed it had the same productions standards as your average Youtube video.  Who are all these people that actually work on the show all of a sudden?  And why haven’t they ever done anything to avoid all of those catastrophes that have taken place on camera over the years?

Becky starts to get all freaked out about bungee jumping even though the bungee jumping grandma tells her that this spot has a perfect safety record.  She actually doesn’t seem worried until right after she’s given that information, which is pretty odd.  Becky decides to punk out on bungee jumping but the bungee jumping grandma says that she’ll save the show by doing the jump in her bikini, which gets a big laugh.  An old lady in a bikini?  What a ridiculous idea!  Put that old bat in a burka!  Or, better yet, don’t let her go outside at all!  Anyway, Becky laments not doing the jump but Danny comforts her briefly before saying, “I’m gonna get some danish and some makeup, and…something else.  See ya,” which struck me as very odd.  Was that moment unscripted?  What did he mean by “something else?”  Why did that happen?

Jesse rides his motorcycle onto the set and walks right up to Becky, which isn’t a big problem because the show is on a commercial break, not that he knows that, or cares.  It’s not like shit like that hasn’t happened on Wake Up, San Francisco a million times before anyway.  Inspiring, gentle music plays as Jesse tells Becky that he understands her now and that she should take a risk if she wants to.  Becky says that she’s too scared to jump but Jesse tries to convince her that she should do it and then the crew tell him to get off the set because the show’s about to start back up.  Seriously, where did this adroit crew come from all of a sudden?  I’m completely blown away.

Danny asks Becky whether or not she’s going to jump and then he’s taken back by the site of the bungee jumping grandma in a thong, which is only referred to and never seen.  Once the show starts up again, Becky decides on-camera that she’s going to be jumping with Jesse, who she grabs and pulls onto the set.  Jesse disputes this but is ultimately forced to do the jump with her.

Right before they jump, they both say, “have mercy,” and then there’s some footage of (less obvious) stunt doubles making the jump.  As they hang from the cord, Becky tells Jesse that she loves him and that she’s so glad she did this and then the credits come on.

The two of them dangling helplessly upside down from a thin cord above a dangerous chasm seems like a pretty apt metaphor for their relationship.

 

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130 Responses to Season 8, Episode 21, “Leap of Faith”

  1. highschoolreader says:

    I just wanted to say I’ve been reading your website every Friday after school since high school (I had no friends and this was my sole source of happiness)

    Now I’m on break so for the first time I’m reading this first thing in the morning and since there’s no interesting/funny commentary going on I just want to say thank you for existing and creating this blog.
    I watched this show during my Olsen twin phase when I was nine and even then some things perturbed me. (LIKE THE TIME JESSE CONSOLED MICHELLE OVER THE PAINTED BUNNIES LIKE WTF??? THOSE WERE STEPHANIE’S BUNNIES!! Also the lack of continuity would throw me off..)

    But I guess my point is that you’ve articulated everything nine year old me wanted to say but couldn’t. (By the way, this blog alone has expanded my vocabulary so much that I give you credit for my prefect score on that part of the SAT’s…you don’t run a math blog by any chance do you?)

    Anyway, I’ve never commented because of what I said above about far more interesting comments being posted by the time I read your latest entry but also because based on the fans in the comments, everyone seems to be adults who actually grew up in the 90’s rather than just being born in the 90’s. Alas, I wanted to express my gratitude before the last episode (*cries*)

    Anyway, thank again!

    (also happy holidays/new years/I wish you good luck for the rest of your life)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jamie says:

      I’m also fresh outta high school, was obsessed with the Olsen twins as well, and this blog helped my vocabulary, too! haha. I love it so much.

      Like

      • Yolanda says:

        I’ve been reading this since I was in high school on Friday afternoons too, so don’t worry, you’re not alone, I was born in the 90’s and only starting watch Full House as a teenager, and found this site as I finished it. 🙂

        Like

  2. JakeBitterman says:

    The whole convicing Michelle she had a disease is one of the more painfully unfunny gags this show has ever done, and that is saying something.

    I for some reason always remember when girls agree to do something grown up together one of the things they sugguest is to see a PG rated movie. Do they even make PG movies anymore? As tame as a Counting Crows concert is, there probably are some doobies being passed around, and you know there are some groupies backstage. So if their alternative to that is a PG movie I’d say Michelle is getting jipped in the whole “grown up event” thing.

    How did the meet-up go? If I werent on the other side of the country I would have come out for it.

    Like

    • Chuck says:

      Apparently for the Tanner girls, a PG movie’s a big deal…remember how, in Steve’s first appearance back in season 5, he wants to see a PG movie w/DJ, but Stephanie shoots it down b/c there are no parents present?

      Like

    • Sarah J says:

      PG movies used to be edgier than they are today, but even then they weren’t treated as “big kid” activities or whatever.

      Like

  3. Michelle's acting coach says:

    It’s pretty clear Jesse only values Becky’s life because without her he’d have to take care of two kids he can’t understand. He would still have money because of Michelle’s dad. He knows where his bread is buttered which is why he got so close to Michelle. Becky was just the back up plan, and unlike Michelle where he only got to first base, he got to bang Becky.

    Like

  4. Sara Wilson says:

    Very funny review, again!
    I always took that Danny moment to just be his case of nerves, you know how he always had the bad habit of rambling to show his nerves or get away from a situation. Unfortunately this show’s not cool enough to let an unscripted moment sneak in, but that would be fantastic!
    It’s weird seeing no other replies yet- I take it everyone is still busy celebrating the holidays! Hope everyone enjoyed their time!!

    Like

    • Sarah Portland says:

      I blame the holiday falling on a Wednesday. It was a random day off in the middle of the week, and I think people get lost a bit when that happens. I’ll sometimes drop by here randomly to see how people have responded since last time I was here, and it happened yesterday. “Hey, there’s a new FHR up… that’s weird. Why would Billy post today? Wait, what day is it?…”
      That also happened to me a lot when I worked retail. I’d look at my schedule for the week, and go, “Wait, why do I have Tuesday off? But I’m working Saturday? That makes no sense! I ALWAYS work on Tuesdays, and I never… oh, Tuesday is Christmas. The store is closed.”

      Like

      • Sara Wilson says:

        HAHA, same here Sarah! I was laughing reading that last line especially because I worked retail for 6 years and I used to do that all the time! “Why is everyone off Sunday??” people would just look at me like “umm, Sara it’s Easter.” LOL!

        Like

  5. RachWho? says:

    How the hell did Joey get tickets to Counting Crows? Although it might not set you back a pretty penny these days to hire that band for a corporate retreat, back then they were big name headliners.

    If Michelle believed that spots stuck to a mirror that didn’t move with her facial movements was actually some kind of measles, she deserves to go to the concert because she’s clearly suffered a traumatic stroke.

    Like

    • Sara Wilson says:

      LOL ditto on the mirror spots thing! So incredibly silly how they’re showing up all over the mirror PAST her face and she still fell for it.

      Like

      • Lisa says:

        If I remember correctly, Michelle did say something like, “they are on my pillow, too” before Stephanie took the mirror away but it was still a stupid bit and I’m pretty sure they stole those measles from the “zit stickers” in the Girl Talk board game (dumbest board game ever invented) that was popular in the early 90’s.

        Like

      • astrowaffle says:

        My friends and I tried to play Girl Talk last weekend for the nostalgia! Unfortunately it was a lot like Full House where we remembered it to be better than the horrible mess it was

        Like

      • Penny says:

        Ha! I had Girl Talk: Date Line. And even though I was, like, 10, I remember being kind of perturbed how ugly the “hunk” was and how good-looking the “nerd” was. And how the nerdy girl and the nerdy guy wouldn’t match up. And how the whole damn game was on a cassette tape that you often caught mid-conversation, so it didn’t work very well. And how after playing it a few times you had memorized each pathetic conversation and you knew what was coming. Anyway, now that I’m starting to feel like Bridget, I will say that I miss the 90s.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sarah Portland says:

        I never had Girl Talk. But my friend had that Mall game. Does anyone remember that? No? Just me?

        Like

      • SavaFiend says:

        I had Girl Talk, the tape cassette thing was super annoying! And check this: I still HAVE Mall Madness at my mom’s in storage, fully intact, along with some other gems from back in the day like Fireball Island! Lame, yes, but hell, now that my daughter is 10, I feel like whipping it out again, LOL

        Like

      • penny says:

        “Annnd… at. the. book. store.”

        Like

      • Michelle says:

        nothing more embarrassing than playing the Girl Talk game and having to put on a zit sticker when you already had zits haha 😦

        Like

      • Billy Superstar says:

        Mall Madness! I played that with some friends on New Years Eve a few years ago. That shit was a blast!

        Like

      • Teebore says:

        I *just* played Mall Madness with some friends this last summer. It was surprisingly fun.

        “There’s a sale at the boutique”

        Like

      • Kayla says:

        Oh wow. This thread brought back so many memories. I had forgotten about the “zit stickers”…I think my friends and I opted to not use them! Too awkward.

        And I definitely still have Mall Madness somewhere! I could hear the “there’s a sale at the boutique” in my head, Teebore. haha.

        Like

      • penny says:

        “Annnd… at. the. book. store.”

        Like

      • Stephen says:

        lol I remember Girl Talk but I am a boy and didn’t play with those girly toys. And I remember Mall Madness too, but also, never played it. I played with Micro Machines and Hot Wheels cars and Playmobil. But I’ll admit, sometimes those Barbie playsets like the minivan and the hotel looked more fun than a stupid action figure. Wasn’t Girl Talk referenced in the Simpsons once? Where Homer ended up with the football player and Bart got the dud that looked like Milhouse? lol

        Like

  6. Alison says:

    There are 7 other people in that house besides Nicky and Alex, and not one of them was watching them when they fushed whatever down the toilet?? If Becky was home, Danny was home since they have the same job. It’s been pointed out that Joey and Jesse don’t seem to work in this episode, and Steph DJ and Michelle seem to be too cool for school, even though it’s a week day (unless Wake Up Sanfrancisco is filmed on the weekend??).

    I really don’t know why I try to make sense of this.

    Like

  7. Richard B says:

    Okay, yes, Michelle is a real shit for wanting those tickets when she hasn’t even heard of the band. But can you even believe what a douchebag Danny is? Joey specifically gave the tickets to DJ and Stephanie, but just because Michelle wants to go Danny decides that they have to draw straws? Did you win the fucking tickets, Danny? DID YOU?!

    “I’m starting to think that Full House might not be a very good show.” Hey, I just think you need to give it some more time.

    So Michelle manipulated Danny into giving her Stephanie’s ticket – which means Stephanie can’t go – because she wanted to hang out with DJ and Stephanie? What?

    “Anyway, Becky laments not doing the jump but Danny comforts her briefly before saying, “I’m gonna get some danish and some makeup, and…something else.  See ya,” which struck me as very odd.  Was that moment unscripted?  What did he mean by “something else?”  Why did that happen?” That whole exterior shot seem like they did it in one take. Bob Saget keep fucking up his lines, an arm is visible right in front of the camera, but they still kept it that way. Probably because exterior shots are more expensive. Or because they wanted to have a real live broadcast authenticity. Nah, it’s a money thing.

    Three episodes left to go, go Billy!

    Like

    • Lisa says:

      “I’m starting to think that Full House might not be a very good show.” I liked this quote, too. The last two episodes revolve around Michelle. I can’t wait to read those reviews since Michelle is Billy’s favorite character and all.

      Like

    • Angela says:

      Great point about the tickets! This storyline always used to tick me off as it was when I was a kid because, y’know, I sympathized with DJ and Stephanie about how annoying it was for Michelle to ALWAYS get her way, but you just added a whole new reason as to why this was total BS. Especially since, as you note, Michelle’s reasoning doesn’t even make sense seeing that Stephanie would be left out.

      Danny starts telling DJ about all of the new responsibilities she has now that she’s bringing her stupid little baby sister to the concert and then, when DJ complains, he explains to her that life isn’t always fair. But wasn’t the whole pretense for making the girls draw straws that it was the only way to make things fair? So why does that have to be fair, but this other thing doesn’t?

      These questions from the review are good, too. Except now my head hurts after trying to figure all this out. Considering Jesse’s “I can do whatever I want but you can’t” attitude in regard to Becky, once again, it’s blatantly obvious as to where Michelle gets her attitude about life.

      We’ll just sum it all up by saying Michelle sucks. Much easier.

      Like

  8. maggie says:

    When I’m scrolling through the Dish guide and I see Counting Cars I think of this, if I remember correctly it’s one of the ways Michelle messes up the name of Counting Crows.

    Like

    • Sara Wilson says:

      Oh man, good catch! Counting Cars is one of my favorite shows to catch on tv, so funny that the name came up on some random old full house episode!

      Like

  9. Penny says:

    Michelle called them “Counting Cows.” Sadly, whenever I hear one of their songs, it’s all I think of.

    Like

  10. Christian says:

    Wow, they’re really testing the viewers’ limit in these final episodes. Every character needed a punch in the dick this time around, not just one or two. Michelle, aside from having the world’s most punchable face, was a total bitch for conning her way into getting that ticket. Danny for giving DJ the “life’s not fair” speech instead of Michelle. DJ and Stephanie for stealing a plot from “I Love Lucy” and then making it shitty. Jesse for, once again, being a self-absorbed asshole to Becky. Becky for pussing out of the jump and then implying she can’t do it without a man. And Joey just needs a punch in the dick for breathing…constantly.

    Like

    • Bridget says:

      I have a better idea: send Hit Girl or the Bride from “Kill Bill” to slaughter all these morons. Spare Comet’s life and take him along to have a happy, indulged life with a nice family!

      Like

      • Sarah Portland says:

        You know, Bridget, I hate movies like that, but I would gladly sit through 2+ hours of Full House slaughter.

        Like

      • Christian says:

        Reminds me of the South Park episode where the Kardashians were massacred by a psycho on their TV show. Makes me wish that Full House would end like that.

        Like

      • Bridget says:

        Might be a rating’s boom to watch the most insufferable family get their comeuppance!

        Like

      • Christian says:

        Kimmy Gibler should do def kill them off “Kill Bill” style with the Hatori Hanzo sword and while wearing Uma Thurman’s yellow jump suit.

        I’d watch an entire series of just that!

        Like

      • Sarah Portland says:

        Like season 4 of AD, they should devote one episode apiece to the slaughter of each family member. But then that begs the question: Joey first, or Joey last?

        Like

      • SMS says:

        Send in the Terminator! Watch Arnie terminate the Tanners and save the future.

        Like

  11. Jennie says:

    Now that I have caught up and Billy is in the final lap of the race, I am going to start reading the blog again. Thank you Billy Superstar for 8 seasons of pain and suffering for hours of laughs for the rest of us.

    Like

  12. Bridget says:

    Great! Add “Adrenaline Junky” to the list of worthless human attributes for Jesse! I studied the endocrine system and I learned how powerful hormones truly are. Adrenaline is no exception. Sure, it helps people lift cars off their kids, but when the high is over with, people feel the after effects of the rush. People aren’t healthy if their hormone levels are too high or too low. Robert Wadlow died at age 22 because his growth hormone made his legs grow at an obscene rate and he couldn’t feel them. A leg brace he wore rubbed into his skin and gave him blood poisoning. As in the case of Jesse and Edna, all that adrenaline will give them a rush, but people who keep seeking a adrenaline rush through dangerous sports become addicted to the rush and they become like druggies looking for their next fix. Too much adrenaline can affect the heart as well. On the subject of Michelle: Danny should have told her that her sisters can do an activity with her and ask her why she wants to see a band she never listens to.

    Like

  13. Alexis Devan says:

    My friend Scooter Rodriguez found this website last night while I was watching reruns of Full House and mentioned how ridiculous it was that Danny was 33 and DJ was 13. We got scared that Scooter might be living a Tyler Durden like existense and writing this blog unconsiously. It sounds so much like him. Whoever you are, great job!

    Like

  14. “Becky decides that she wants to actually have some dignity for the first time sine her tragic wedding day and tells Jesse to go suck a dick because she’s totally going bungee jumping whether he likes it or not. You go, girl!

    This paired with that “O” face shot? I was dying. DYING!

    Loved the last paragraph with bungee jumping as a metaphor for their marriage as well!

    Like

  15. Jamie says:

    Omg, I hate the plot about Danny giving Michelle the ticket SO MUCH

    Like

  16. Jamie says:

    Okay, I’m the youngest of three girls and we literally have the same age differences as the Tanner’s (I hate that I can relate to them in any way, ugh.), and back when I was around Michelle’s age my parents got my sister’s tickets to a Blink 182 concert and I acted mildly upset but they simply told me I was too young and could go to concerts when I was older. Why couldn’t Danny just do that? WHY did he have to appease her?! He’s the biggest dipshit in the world! (with the exception of Joey, obviously.)

    I love how you point out that sometimes the uncles have jobs and sometimes they sit around like lazy unemployed assholes. The writers of this show literally did not give one fuck!

    “I’m starting to think that Full House might not be a very good show.”
    hehehe, you might be onto something, Billy…

    Perfect review as always, hope everyone had happy holidays ^.^

    Like

    • Sarah Portland says:

      That’s totally what I was thinking! I’ve seen grade-schoolers go to concerts, but it was like Taylor Swift or Hannah Montana, and they were always accompanied by a parent. Giving the tickets to the older girls and then saying “You know what? Let’s draw straws?” totally sucks. Stephanie spends this whole episode wondering whether or not she’s going to a concert. I feel bad enough for her on that score that it almost makes up for that lame “you have a disease” plot that she and DJ cook up. Almost…

      Like

    • kenzington says:

      Not only that, but concerts for musical acts you’re not actually into can be the opposite of fun. My first concert was Bruce Springsteen, which my dad dragged me to, and I actually fell asleep out of boredom. It might’ve been cool if he were willing to play any of his hits, but nope.

      Like

      • Jamie says:

        Exactly! I was about 10 when I went to my first real concert, but it was Hillary Duff (I was obsessed with Lizzie McGuire), and I went with my dad (poor guy). Danny acts like the most over-protective square ever, but he’d let Michelle go to a concert that would most likely be attended by people way older than her?

        Like

      • Jamie says:

        And Kenzington, I can relate. My dad dragged me to an Allman Brothers concert once. I was too young to appreciate that they’re actually pretty classic, but still…then again, after all the Jonas Brothers concerts I dragged him too when I was 13, I was due for some payback.

        Like

      • kenzington says:

        My dad made up for it by taking me to see Prince when I was in college, which was actually the best concert I’ve ever been to. But he would not touch my first-concert-by-choice (Matchbox20) with a ten-foot pole—my mom took me.

        Like

      • Sarah Portland says:

        My mom got tickets to Kenny Loggins, and no one wanted to go with her, so I volunteered. I’m not really a fan, but it wasn’t terrible. I think people were surprised to see a pre-teen there. They were mostly aging hippies.
        I definitely looked more like the concert-goers for the next concert that I bought tickets for – Barenaked Ladies.

        Like

      • SavaFiend says:

        You guys are lucky, my parents would never dream of taking me to a concert – they listen to oldies music and disco, so that’s a good thing anyway. I wasn’t even allowed to go to a concert til I was 13, and my first show was Skid Row with Pantera and Korn as the opening acts! 🙂

        Like

  17. Sarah Portland says:

    So, somebody posted this to my page the other day, saying that it just “screamed” me. I’m not even sure that she knows that I hate Full House.
    http://www.geekosystem.com/doctor-who-uncle-joey/

    Let’s review:
    1. No
    2. That doesn’t even look like him.
    3. No
    4. Fuck that shit. Fuck it sideways with a katana.

    Like

  18. Beth says:

    I always hated this episode because, as usual, it centered around Michelle. I agree with Richard B. on this one though. Michelle is a spoiled little brat, but the person we should really be mad at is douche bag Danny. He always let’s Michelle have her way in the word of “Fairness” which is total bullshit! This episode and the episode where Danny let Michelle choose the winning prize from that catalog for finding the owner’s parrot bugged my brother and I the most when we were growing up and I still have a real hatred for them now. You know it’s a bad show when children who are fans of the show, start to hate it because of the ridiculous favoritism that is shown to Michelle. Nice post as usual. 🙂

    Like

  19. Bossk says:

    Next week is a Gia week. Woot woot!

    Like

  20. astrowaffle says:

    I can’t believe this is almost over, I’m so happy for you Billy and so sad for us.
    “I’m starting think this might not be a very good show”

    Like

  21. PinkDork says:

    What kind of an asshole sends a pre-pube to a music show? Every adult near her would be squirming and wishing she’d been left at home with a sitter. Or her goddamn father or any of the other worthless unemployed denizens of the full house. Dick move.

    Like

    • DawnieP says:

      Also, what time was the concert supposed to end? I went to plenty of concerts on weekdays & they didn’t finish until around midnight. Not to mention all the pot smokers in the crowd. Is this the type of environment he wants for his precious Michelle??

      Like

      • Bridget says:

        Pink Dork and DawnieP, DJ would be the loser too if she took Michelle instead of Stephanie. Michelle would have stories about pot being exchanged at the concert and people being drugged out of their minds. She would tell Danny how bored she was and he would blame DJ for not occupying her little sister during the concert!

        Like

  22. Papouli says:

    My biggest problem with Full House is the ambiguous timing of Wake Up, San Francisco.

    Your local news station morning show would probably be on at what, 6 AM to 7 AM or something like that before all the national Good Morning America/Today show stuff takes over? And there has to be some significant pre and post-show production meetings and such. Yet how many episodes show Danny and Becky at the breakfast table with the girls? Even if Wake Up, San Francisco lets Danny and Becky get home by 8:30 or 9, the kids should be at school at that point. So either they all wake up at 4 AM to eat breakfast (wouldn’t surprise me with the Tanner family), the girls don’t go to school until the afternoon (again, wouldn’t surprise me with Jesse as a role model), or there’s some kind of time warping going on around the Full House.

    Like

    • Angela says:

      I’m so glad I’m not the only one who’s wondered about that stuff. My mom asks the same thing whenever we see kids getting ready for school on these shows. I know some schools start later, sure, but the way these kids mosey about the house in the morning, sometimes I think they don’t start school until, like, 10 or 11 in the morning. It’s always really light out and everyone’s WAY too put together and awake for whatever time of the morning they’re supposed to be up (though I’m willing to excuse that last one to some degree-there ARE morning people out there, after all).

      I laughed at the part in the review where Billy was going on about the random crew and why they didn’t do anything when all the insane stuff would happen on the talk show. My reasoning is that they’re too scared of the wrath of the Tanner family, or having to deal with one of Michelle’s whiny fits or something.

      Like

    • Oh Mylanta says:

      I’ve been wondering the same thing for years. The full house is totally messing with the space-time continuum here.

      Like

    • Nukegrrrl says:

      Not to mention all the time the girls must have needed in the morning to fluff up their bangs and put on their Bump-its.

      Like

  23. Oh Mylanta says:

    Ah, the Counting Crows. “SHA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LAAAA…. UH-HUH…. MR. JONES AND ME…”

    I love how each review has had a slightly more exasperated tone than the last. “Michelle overhears that Stephanie and DJ were given tickets to a concert and she’s like, “why don’t I get to go to the concert? DON’T YOU ALL UNDERSTAND THAT EVERYTHING IS ALL ABOUT ME, ALL OF THE TIME!??!” Hang in there, Billy, you’re almost done! I know you can’t wait for this shit to be over, but I gotta say, Friday mornings won’t be the same without a new FHR post to read…

    Liked by 1 person

  24. RG says:

    God, this episode infuriates me. Michelle has never even HEARD of the group, and can’t even say the name of the damn group right. Yet she weasels the ticket away from Stephanie?! Poor Stephanie always gets the short end of the straw, both figuratively, and literally. Though I agree with the previous posters, Danny is the one we probably should be blaming. I guess he hasn’t learned anything from letting Michelle bring home some cut out poster of some creepy looking guy. Yet another episode I skip over whenever this episode comes on in reruns. The B story was really lame too, though good for Becky for going through with the bungee jumping. Now her next duty is to divorce her self centered, self entitled husband Jesse once and for all.

    Great stuff like always. Next week’s episode should be better, even though that’s not saying much. Just three more episodes and then it’s all over.

    Like

    • Nukegrrrl says:

      I’ve always figured that Becky was trapped in her greasy marriage because CA community property laws would entitle Jesse to a good chunk of her “Wake Up” earnings, then it would be back to Nebraska for her sorry ass. I think that is also why Jesse never chose to have gainful employment, or underemployment in Joey’s ruses.

      Like

  25. Bilbo says:

    The reason why michelle is such a spoiled piece of shit is because every character has to be a part of every plot and without her being a bitch they have no plot

    Like

  26. DawnieP says:

    Great review as always Billy! Congrats on sticking with this project for so long. How was the meetup?

    Like

  27. Stacy says:

    The only thing I can figure about Jesse and Joey sitting around watching Wake Up, San Francisco and still be radio DJs is that the WUSF is on early enough for them to not need to leave for work for their afternoon radio dj-ing gig.

    I actually just felt a little queasy when it fully hit me that very soon there will be no more new reviews.

    Ready for some full on 90s-ness? My first concert was….New Kids on the Block. (If I remember the time frame correctly it was February of 1990. I was in 8th grade.) I honestly can’t remember if a parent was with us. I THINK my best friend’s mom was. I know it wasn’t my parents. Ironically, by the time I actually went to the NKOTB concert (we got the tickets months in advance) I was kinda over them and MAJORLY into Skid Row and other hair metal bands. Soon after, I went to my first rock concert – say age 14, maybe 13, and I remember my parents or my friend’s parents would drop us off at the concert place and then pick us up at the end. Which now makes me sad as I realize I don’t have that concert memory with my dad. My dad was also into that type of music (we would join those record clubs – Columbia House anyone? – and get albums and copy them onto tape so we both had our copies and could share a lot of the same stuff), but I don’t think we ever went to a concert together. I don’t think he ever really went to concerts though. Only concert I can remember him going to was the Eagles with his bitch wife sometime in the 90s.

    Like

    • SavaFiend says:

      My parents tried to force NKOTB on me because they thought that was what girls my age “should” listen to. They didn’t like my hair band obsession, and tried to curb it, and failed. My first concert was Skid Row with Pantera and Korn opening for them back in 1991, it rocked! And I still had the high hair bangs thing going on and some overzealous doofus next to me with a lighter almost set my hair on fire during “I Remember You”.

      Like

      • Jennie says:

        My hubby was very sick and spent sometime in the hospital a few years ago. One of his nurses was the lead singer of Pantera for a short time in the 80s, gave up being a rockstar to get into nursing .. too funny.

        Liked by 1 person

  28. Hawkeye says:

    Did anyone else notice how the TV in the Tanner living room doesn’t have a cord in the back?

    Like

  29. Ashley says:

    “Danny explains that she, like the majority of America, doesn’t even like the Counting Crows, but Michelle insists that she’s totally a fan.”

    I laughed so suddenly and so hard at this line that it actually hurt. Ow.

    Another episode I remember watching as a kid and getting angry over- surprisingly not so much at Michelle, even though she sucks as usual- but at Danny for screwing over Stephanie in favor of Michelle for the hundredth time DESPITE THE FACT THAT THE TICKETS WERE A GIFT. FROM JOEY. TO D.J. AND STEPHANIE. NOT MICHELLE. What the fuck, Danny?

    And when did Jesse become an adrenaline junkie? Was that visited in previous episodes? Because I’m drawing a blank. You would think someone that loves the thrill of potentially dangerous situations would be doing something more constructive with his time rather than living in his brother-in-law’s attic and being essentially unemployed.

    Like

    • Papouli says:

      There was the episode way back in the day where Scott Baio showed up and convinced him to jump his bike off a roof or something to that effect.

      And the time he and Joey went Skydiving on his bloody wedding day and wound up stuck in a tree and a truckbed full of tomatoes.

      Like

    • Lisa says:

      Dr. Dare

      Like

  30. Sarah Portland says:

    I have an idea for that last get together. Does anyone have one of those punching bag things with the sand in the bottom, so when you hit them, they bounce back up? I think we should tape a picture of that screencap of Michelle onto the face of one of those things, and have a Punching Booth.

    Like

  31. Frank says:

    And every time someone punches, there could be a sound clip of Stephanie saying “How Rude!”

    Like

  32. Michelle says:

    I get that Danny is the dad but does he have the authority to redistribute the tickets Joey gave to DJ and Stephanie?

    Like

    • Ruby Lee says:

      Michelle, try this formula, and it will all become clear to you:

      A = ($ Joey owes Danny for puppets, etc) + (cost of rent in enormous Victorian home in SF) x 10 years

      B = (# of cartoon voices Joey has) x (Danny’s lonely nights b/c of Joey’s tomfoolery)

      A + B = Danny can do whatever he wants

      You can add in a variable too [# of people willing to take Joey in if Danny changes the locks = 0 ], and the answer then becomes Danny can make Joey stab himself in the eye with a fork for Michelle’s amusement.

      It’s pretty basic algebra.

      Liked by 2 people

  33. Blaaaaaaaaaa says:

    I’ve always hated this episode. It’s so boring and I hate how Michelle wants to go to a concert when she doesn’t even know who’s playing. That makes no sense. And Joey gave those tickets Stephanie and DJ,not to Michelle and DJ. Stephanie got cheated with the whole straw thing. Can Danny tell Michelle no for once?

    Like

    • Bridget says:

      Blaaaaaaaaaa, he can’t tell her no because it goes against her being the ruler of the FH realm! I think if a parent doesn’t tell a child no at times, they are doing a massive disservice to the kid! In 1996, Jessica Dubroff was a 7 year old girl who was allowed to fly an airplane with her father, Lloyd Dubroff and flight instructor, Joe Reid. Her parents allowed her and her siblings to do whatever they wanted and never told them no. Long story short, the plane crashed after take off in this horrible rain storm and all aboard were killed. I know this story is a bit extreme, but Danny is not doing Michelle any favors by letting her do whatever she wants to do.

      Like

      • Jennie says:

        I remember this story, I was in HS at the time and just got my drivers license. I couldn’t believe that I wasn’t allowed to drive my car after 9pm, due to laws for drivers under 18 in NYS, but a 7 year old was allowed to fly a plane.

        Like

      • Bridget says:

        Jennie, Jessica’s mom, Lisa Blair Hathaway was this nutty hippie type who wouldn’t let her kids eat junk food, watch TV and play with toys. She actually said her daughter died in a state of joy and she thought emotions were unnatural! I think some activities are better enjoyed when a person is older. I think a person should get their driver’s license when they’re 19 or 20. Kids who are 16 can be distracted and they have a tendency to speed.

        Like

  34. Mr Goodpart says:

    I am at times supportive of Danny as a (relatively) respectable member of the Full House. He’s dealt with the tragic death of his wife, and he supports an entire band of selfish freeloaders. But this overkill sucking of Michelle’s dick is just beyond the pale.

    A) Is a rock concert an appropriate place for a 9 year old? Not that the Counting Crows are super hardcore or anything, but there WILL be weed smoke wafting through the crowd.

    B) Put your fucking foot down! How easy would it be to explain to this little spoiled shit that this is really something for older people and I’ll take you somewhere else fun???

    Poor form, Danny. Spineless twit. No wonder Vicky left you for New York. Men there know how to make a 9 year old shut the fuck up.

    Like

    • Bridget says:

      Mr. Goodpart, they should find a kid’s concert for Michelle to attend with her friends or Danny. I don’t like the idea of an 8 to 9 year old kid attending a concert with people smoking pot and doing God knows what else! I saw “Woodstock” and the hippies there took their children to that concert. The Rolling Stones had a bunch of Hell’s Angels serve as bouncers and they killed a guy at the concert! The motor cycle guys, not the Rolling Stones. Imagine if someone got killed at the Counting Crows concert! Danny shouldn’t let his young daughter rule the roost like she does! I think Pam is probably saying to God, “You know, I don’t like how he is raising Michelle! Can I go down there and haunt them?”

      Like

      • Jennie says:

        Bridget, I went to an Eminem show with my former roommates years ago. People were smoking weed everywhere and there were kids there with their parents. I have no idea why anyone would bring someone under the age of 18 to a rap concert.

        Like

      • Bridget says:

        Jennie, Stephen King wrote an article for Entertainment Weekly and in it he mentioned going to the movies to see “The Passion of the Christ” from Mel Gibson. A young girl who appeared to be 8 years old was with her mother and little brother and they were watching this movie! Stephen King felt sorry for this girl he called Alicia in the article because it was a terrible experience for her to watch the Son of God being killed. She was extremely upset and he was upset for her. I think showing children a movie with people being crucified even for religious reasons is going to mess them up. I don’t know what the mother was thinking!

        Like

      • trlkly says:

        Yeah, but at least there’s a possibly religious reason for that. People have been talking about with and showing little kids the brutalities of the Crucifixion for years.

        Plus, despite everyone going on and on about it, it wasn’t that much worse than the typical high quality Crucifixion play.

        Like

      • SavaFiend says:

        I see people take kids to Motley Crue shows, and the Crue is out there with their “titty cam” to get video of girls flashing their boobs, which they project on the big screen for the whole arena to see. Can’t imagine why anyone would take a kid to that (although I bet the young boys were thrilled)!

        Like

      • Bridget says:

        SF, that’s sick! At least at the Beatles and Monkees concerts, they never did that!

        Like

      • Ruby Lee says:

        Bridget, you’re thinking of Altamont. The Hell’s Angels were super aggressive, but in their defense, the guy they killed was high out of his mind, had a gun in his hand, and was approaching the stage to kill Mick Jagger. He was jealous because his girlfriend kept saying how hot she thought Mick was.

        Also in their defense, the Rolling Stones paid the Hell’s Angels for their services with free beer. I’m not even kidding.

        Like

      • Bridget says:

        I think God forgives if a murder is done in self defense and it sounds the killing was! The Hell’s Angels were rewarded with free beer? Sounds great! When it gets slow at check out at Wal-Mart, I could stand up with a blow horn and yell, “Free beer!””. Or yell, “Free Cake!”

        Like

    • catwalkspy says:

      Ha! Agree.

      Like

  35. Lisa says:

    What was DJ’s and Stephanie’s long term plan with this illness bit? Convince Michelle she has a rare disease, get her ticket, go to the concert, and… then what? Continue with the disease thing for the rest of her life? Tell her that they lied and prepare to be grounded forever due to upsetting the precious Michelle?Terrible plan.
    Also, did the the other million people living in the Full House not realize it was 147 degrees in there?

    Like

    • Sarah Portland says:

      I suppose they could always poison her slowly to convince her that she’s dying. You know, like a rent-to-own kind of situation.

      Like

    • Nukegrrrl says:

      I’ve also wondered how nobody else in the house would realize that the heat is cranked up so high. Especially Danny, who is home at the time. Danny totally seems like the kind of dick who would have a locked cover over the house’s thermostat knob.

      Like

    • trlkly says:

      The episode had them telling her it was a 24 hour bug, and that it would only kill adults, which is why she had to hide the fact that she had it from her dad, and just stay away from him.

      You guys have to realize that explanations for things are often left out of the recap.

      Like

  36. catwalkspy says:

    “I can’t think of a better wrap up for this series than these two getting divorced. Oh yeah, also, if Joey died.”

    Ha! Yes!

    Also…any news/pics/videos on the wrap party that happened last week??

    Like

  37. Bubba Santoni says:

    Hey guys how did the party in San Fran go back on the 21st? I was looking forward to some pictures or videos Any wacky stories about our blogger Billy finally revealing his true identity?
    Such a great review of an episode I was not looking forward to at all
    Get your Gob Bluth on and start dancing away with The Final Countdown Billy now that there are only 3 left
    Bubba Santoni

    Like

    • Sara Wilson says:

      haha, it’s been freakishly quiet around here regarding that meet-up last week. I wonder if those in attendance were sworn to secrecy? LOL

      Like

  38. Teebore says:

    As the family all sit around watching Jerry Springer, Joey comes in and gives Stephanie and DJ tickets to the Counting Crows concert.

    Wow, Springer and Counting Crows. Hello, 90s.

    I’m starting to think that Full House might not be a very good show.

    You know, I hate to admit it, but I think you may be right…

    Go make me a sandwich.

    Truly, you are the Leonardo da Vinci of screen capping.

    And who had the idea to convince Michele that she had some obscure disease as a solution?

    The writers, because that’s one of the few sitcom tropes they hadn’t trotted out yet.

    Like

  39. Aunt Becky's Breast Buds says:

    Guys, this has been bothering me for a very long time. When is Danny going to find that hole in the wall that DJ and Stephanie did such a shitty job covering-up? I thought for sure they would get busted, and it has been weighing on me a long time. I keep thinking Danny is going to find it and they are going to have a special talk with the gentle music. Ahhh!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  40. The Exploding Boy says:

    I know I’m very late to this party, but I just wanted to say, I discovered this website a few weeks ago and started reading every entry from the beginning, and I just caught up now.

    I have been going through some shit recently, and I just want to thank you for bringing me some needed joy these few weeks. I’m sad that it’ll end soon, but I’m looking forward to the next episode.

    Thanks again!

    Like

  41. Trenchcoatpanda says:

    I remember watching this episode as a kid, and thinking that Counting Crows was a metal band, since Danny was wearing leather pants.

    I thought they were a metal band till I was in my teens and heard Mr. Jones on the radio. XD

    Like

  42. Orangutan Twin says:

    Wow, Counting Crows. I actually liked that band back in the ’90s. “August & Everything” is a pretty solid album, and I still put it on to chill every now and then.

    I was the same age as the Stephanie character throughout the show, so these last few seasons are a very weird time capsule of my early teen years.

    Like

  43. Chuck says:

    I was also bugged by Danny just letting Michelle take Stephanie’s ticket…he seems to be forgetting his own advice. Remember when Stephanie had the crap scared outta her way back in season 2 while watching The Wolfman? After she couldn’t go to sleep, Danny told her “I know you wanna do everything your big sister does, but some things just have to wait until you’re older”…what gives?

    For the record, my first concert was Cher at the age of 10 (my parents’ choice)…the first concert I attended solo was the Eagles in 05, great show!.

    Like

  44. Kevin says:

    I didn’t read all the comments so I’m not sure if anymore commented on this, but why is the family watching Jerry Springer? Isn’t this the family that are as square as hell? But they are watching trash tv?

    And DJ gets all pissed that she can’t go because her friends will be there and there is a party after. Why didn’t she get tickets? Why does she care so much given the fact that she JUST got these tickets? Who cares I guess.

    Like

  45. Ashley says:

    Michelle seems to grow into a brat more and more as she ages. Usually kids grow out of that, but she is just getting worse. DJ and Stephanie seem so tame compared to Michelle. Although I am glad that the show ended I do wonder how Michelle would have ended up being as a teenager. She’s probably come home pregnant and convince everyone in the house that it’s okay for her to be pregnant. And then have Danny raise the baby while she continues to be a dumb bitch. I wish it could have been her who got punched in the face instead of Stephanie.

    Like

  46. JCC says:

    “…Michelle admits that she’s never even heard of the Counting Crows, and Stephanie and DJ get super pissed.”

    PLEASE DESTROY HER!

    Like

  47. Lisa says:

    “Becky decides that she wants to actually have some dignity for the first time sine her tragic wedding day …”

    Bahahahaha! When I was a little kid, I thought Becky and Jesse’s wedding was the very epitome of romantic. How you are opening my eyes to the truth of its position as the life-cliff over which she dove, Billy.

    “I’m starting to think that Full House might not be a very good show.”

    Oh, come on now. Let’s not jump to insane conclusions!

    Like

  48. lazrfac3 says:

    They jumped off the Pasadena bridge.

    Like

  49. Why was Jesse so afraid to bungee jump in this episode but went out of his way to sky dive on his wedding day?

    Like

  50. Hart says:

    Just found this blog after referring to this episode after loudly singing a counting crows song. I can’t wait to read every entry. Pure comic gold. Thanks for the many laughs!

    Like

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