Season 3, Episode 19, “Those Better Not Be the Days”

Pre-Credits Gag:  Jesse tries to teach Michelle left and right and they have a lame “who’s on first”-esque exchange.

As the girls prepare for a day at the amusement park with Kimmie Gibbler’s family, they order the Dad’s around as a pimp would his hoes.  I wanted to make more snide comments about the girls’ atrocious behavior but then the collection of outfits presented onscreen in this moment totally stole my attention away.  Gaze upon them!

Just as the girls head out, Rebecca Donaldson comes over to “have a picnic” (aka vaginal intercourse) with Jesse.  Meanwhile, Joey and Danny are relieved to have the house all to themselves for once so they can watch sports and trade hand jobs.

But wouldn’t you know it?  It starts raining, so the girls all come back and immediately start demanding that the Dad’s do a bunch more shit for them.  Danny is forced into taking DJ and Kimmie Gibbler to the movies and Stephanie steals Jesse and Rebecca Donaldson’s pic-a-nic basket.  Later the girls demand to be taken ice skating and the Dad’s all get together to talk about how shitty they’re being treated.  See, you never know when the bullshit behavior on this show is going to be acknowledged.  It has seemed pretty piled on in this episode, but the girls behavior is only slightly more unbearable than usual.  Anyway, the Dad’s all lament the fact that they’re the subservient enablers to a bunch of future Long Island trophy wives until Danny cooks up a brilliant scheme.

He calls the girls into the room and tells them that they’re going to play a game where they switch roles.  The girls will be in charge but they’ll have to take on all of the responsibilities of being the grown-ups.  The girls agree and enjoy their first taste of power when they tell the Dads that they can’t watch sports until they clean up their rooms.

The girls raid the junk food and get ready to watch the top 10 video countdown when the Dad’s come in and start bitching and moaning about how they need to be fed lunch.  The girls plays along but Kimmie Gibbler decides that she’s had enough of the Tanner family’s dumb ass nonsense for the week and cuts out.  Oh, if only the camera would follow when Kimmie Gibbler goes!

The girls prepare sandwiches for the Dad’s and then the Dad’s all act like big finicky babies for like 4 minutes.  Eventually the girls get fed up and send the Dads to their rooms, completely missing the irony of the situation.  Maybe that’s why you should actually explain shit to your kids instead of acting out some bizarre psychological game every time you want to make a point.

Despite being grounded, the Dad’s all secretly convene in Joey’s room and share their genuine bafflement at the girls not getting the point of their game.  They decide that if they don’t figure out some way to get the girls to understand how they feel that they’ll be forced to play out these roles for the rest of their lives.  Again, I can’t help but mention that they never once consider resolving this problem with a straightforward conversation.  Instead they decide to sit around and imagine the bleak inevitable future that is being laid out for them.

Danny, Jesse and Joey all wear terrible old man make-up and ham it up in the kitchen as they bicker with their half-assed old man voices.  For some reason Danny becomes a stereotypical East Coast Jew in his old age.

It’s established by their antics that none of these men have made any personal progress whatsoever in the 40 or so years between the present and this fantasy.

Rebecca Donaldson comes over, as she and Jesse are still dating, and there’s a series of gags about how gigantic her ass has gotten as she’s aged.  Everybody rags on her enormous ass for the rest of the scene, which is just one more piece of evidence that Full House is actually just a racist caricature of white people.  Seriously, Rebecca Donaldson, take that big ass over to the set of Good Times and see how you get treated.

Jesse and Rebecca Donaldson get ready to head to the Smash Club so Jesse can do his routine as the world’s oldest Elvis Impersonator but before they can go the Dad’s have to bring the girls their breakfasts.

Here’s where the whole sequence gets totally bizarre.  The girls are all played by grown-up actresses, which is actually pretty jarring but more pleasant to watch than the kids they’re portraying.  The girls appear to be in their late 20’s or early 30’s, so I’m not really sure why they’ve aged 20 years and the dad’s have aged 40 or 50.  It’s made clear that in this dystopian future the Dad’s have developed an enormous contempt for the girls but continue to support them and bend to their every whim as they live out an endless arrested adolescence.  Grown-up Michelle enters the scene and there’s a lame gag about how she stills says “owse” instead of “ice” and then grown-up Kimmie Gibbler comes in and there’s a gag about how bad all the Dad’s wanna fuck her because she grew up to be hella fine.

She tells them, “eat your hearts out, boys.  Too bad you weren’t nicer to me when I was a kid.”  Yeah, I bet they’d be rail-roadin’ her all day long if only they’d be more tolerant of her eccentricities when she was 12.  Let that be a lesson to Dads everywhere.

The girls head off to spend the Dad’s money at the mall, but not before leaving them with a list of chores to do for them while they’re away.  The Dad’s all lament their awful lives and then get into an argument that involves playing keep-away with Jesse’s wig and Joey smashing the other Dad’s with his big fat gut, thus concluding the dream sequence.  When we come back to reality, the Dad’s all agree that there’s a valuable lesson to be learned from this fantasy sequence.  Before we move on, I just want to address something that’s always confused me about these kinds of sequences.  Are we to assume that Jesse and Joey are just sitting there while Danny conceives of this entire bizarre fantasy?  Is he supposed to be describing it word for word, like, “then Michelle comes in and Joey asks her is she wants some pancakes, but then she says, ‘no thanks…got any owse cream?’ and then Kimmie Gibbler comes in and she’s got big ass titties and we’re all like, dang.”  I can understand these kinds of sequences when they’re somebody’s daydream or something but it seems really odd to have this be a narrative that Danny is creating while the Uncles listen intently.  Even if they were all participating in the story, it just seems so fucking weird to me that they’d be spending their time sitting around making this stuff up.  It gets even worse when you step back for a second and look at the big picture.  These guys kids are totally out of control and so they decide to resolve it by staging some esoteric role-reversal game and when the girls miss the point of it the Dads all just sit together in the basement and share a collective hallucination about how the rest of their lives are totally fucked.  Seriously, have you ever seen more unskilled parenting in your life?

Eventually the girls come downstairs and scold the Dads for their ungrateful behavior.  The Dads point out that it feels shitty to feel unappreciated and then the girls finally realize that they never thank the Dads for anything.  The music comes on as DJ expresses her gratitude to the Dads and then everybody hugs.

I like how the whole problem gets boiled down to the girls never saying thank you.  I guess it’s fine that they’re totally pushy, demanding and egocentric, just so long as they occasionally express gratitude for the endless accommodations that are made for them.

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40 Responses to Season 3, Episode 19, “Those Better Not Be the Days”

  1. DrBitz says:

    Did Stephanie steal the picnic basket via some complicated scheme involving repelling from a tree and a bow with a plunger arrow? And did Ranger Smith get mad?

    Also, I never really did think about the multiple people day dreaming sequence (heavily featured on Saved By The Bell) before but you’re right, it really doesn’t make any sense.


  2. Teebore says:

    It’s pretty much got to be in the contracts of sitcoms that they must throw at least a portion of their cast into unflattering senior citizen makeup at least once, right? It happens all the time.

    So once again my memory is fractured, as I (sadly) remember the dads’ effed dream sequence/mass hallucination vividly, but until you got there, I had no recollection of this episode at all.

    The girls will be in charge but they’ll have to take on all of the responsibilities of being the grown-ups.

    You know, Michelle kind makes out like a bandit on this deal. I’m mean, what’s she going to do as “an adult”? She’s getting babied no matter what.

    The girls plays along but Kimmie Gibbler decides that she’s had enough of the Tanner family’s dumb ass nonsense for the week and cuts out.

    Frankly, I’m surprised she stuck around as long as she did…

    Again, I can’t help but mention that they never once consider resolving this problem with a straightforward conversation.

    That’s not how things roll in the full house!

    Jesse and Rebecca Donaldson get ready to head to the Smash Club so Jesse can do his routine as the world’s oldest Elvis Impersonator but before they can go the Dad’s have to bring the girls their breakfasts.

    So are they girls sleeping REALLY late, or is Jesse performing REALLY early?

    Yeah, I bet they’d be rail-roadin’ her all day long if only they’d be more tolerant of her eccentricities when she was 12. Let that be a lesson to Dads everywhere.

    Really, I think that’s the lesson to take away from this episode: today’s annoying twelve-year-old could be tomorrow’s gold-digging trophy wife.😉


  3. Don’t remember seeing this one at all, thank god.

    It’s so weird about this dream sequence: presumably, it would have been used to show an internal change in the dads, but it doesn’t change them; it just makes them more depressed. It’s the girls who suddenly change, for no discernable reason. UGH. It hurts so good.


  4. Roxy says:

    I was never able to watch the dream sequence.I always fast forwarded because I don’t like these kind of things.I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Stephanie and DJ were incredibly well behaved compared to Michelle.Why did people think it was SOOO CUTE when Michelle would eat the cake with her hands, making a mess?


  5. The Complexities of Full House says:

    Here’s a fun factoid that makes this episode even more disturbing: Grown-up Michelle ended up marrying (and later divorcing) Dave Coulier. Yep. “Owse cream” girl and Uncle Joey ended up together. Picture that and then try to sleep tonight.


    • Ramon says:

      That terrified me so much I had to actually research it.


    • Dalif says:

      Gonna assume they ended up together as a result of this episode being filmed. It aired in Feb of 1990, and they were married in June of 1990. Give Mr. Coulier a few months of courtship to establish aggro, then a quick wedding, 2 years of glorified marriage and one kid later, she likely had enough of getting told to cut it out (with associated hand gesture) and Bullwinkle refs. Divorce was inevitable.


      • Attzz says:

        Their kid was born in November and conceived in February, so no doubt Joey Glads poked a hole in the condom so she’d be forced to shotgun marry him.


      • Stephen says:

        So I’m guessing February is also when this episode was taped? It’s not unusual for episodes to air in the same month that they’re taped. There’s a few episodes of Roseanne that aired a week or so after being taped. And one that aired 5 days after, in season 8.


      • Jen says:

        Maybe she has an old man fetish and the sight of Dave Coulier in costume inflamed her desires and hijinks ensued.


    • michmich says:

      Thanks for the nightmares


  6. Ren says:

    Out of all the characters on the show, Kimmie Gibbler does grow up to be the hottest. I can also see John Stamos in the same outfit he was wearing in the flashback in about 30 years.


  7. Pete says:

    Rebecca’s old lady ass later was the inspiration for Nicki Minaj to develop said old lady ass.


  8. “The girls agree and enjoy their first taste of power when they tell the Dads that they can’t watch sports until they clean up their rooms.”

    Wait, how is that less pleasurable for Danny than a hand-job from Joey? He gets to, nay, is FORCED TO, clean up!


    • tildeloltilde says:

      When DJ said this didn’t Danny say something along the lines “Well, looks like I can watch sports right now.” with a smug look on his face?


  9. Zozo says:

    One of my favorite Full House episodes. I guess it’s because of the disturbing theme. And the adult Stephanie isn’t half as annoying as the real one.


  10. PuppetDoctor says:

    I couldn’t keep my eyes off of Danny’s ugly sweater jacket. It makes DJ’s tacky vest look pretty.


  11. lillian fitzroy says:

    anyone notice how fucking horrible jessies bald cap is executed! I acctually enjoyed seeing the girls “grown up” but it was hard to enjoy for two reasons, first being how AWEFUL jessies make up is second being that I kept compareing them to what the girls acctually look like now and how much the actress’s look nothing at all how they all look now you would think they would have put in a little effort. all considered shitty job dear people of full house. AND i’m a fan! lol


    • Kelvis says:

      Jesse’s bald cap! It sucks. That is one of the things I remember most about this episode. I can see that wrinkled deflated looking thing in my nightmares.


  12. Santanaonfire says:

    “She tells them, “eat your hearts out, boys. Too bad you weren’t nicer to me when I was a kid.” Yeah, I bet they’d be rail-roadin’ her all day long if only they’d be more tolerant of her eccentricities when she was 12. Let that be a lesson to Dads everywhere.”

    Its not too late! As this is just a day-dream sequence, they could choose to make this change now. I bet the Bob Sagat represented in a recurring role on Entourage would be chasing the hell out of some Kimmy Gibbler tail now!


  13. Gregorio says:

    I have been blasting through this blog the past few days, and as much as I love it, I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt in hoping that your apostrophe misuse gets a little better as time goes on. This only bothers me because because you only fucked it up as far referring to the Dads in the plural sense. Seriously, you didn’t even need that apostrophe when you were saying that the Dads were doing something. I’m trying not to sound like a shithead, but I guess we all have our peeves.


  14. kp199 says:

    Boy were they desperate for story lines or what. This was one of the stupidest episodes (from what I remember).


  15. Allison says:

    You know what the irony of the ‘dream sequence’ is? I think it’s 100% possible, given that Michelle freaks out whenever someone tries to move out. Once DJ tries (or…tried since this takes place in the 90s) to go to college, I bet Michelle began to cry and beg her to continue living in the full house, which she likely still is to this day.


  16. Pin a rose on your nose says:

    Why is the girls’ room exactly the same 20 years later? You expect me to believe they didn’t buy new shit with the Dad’s money? It’s sad that no one bothered to suggest re-dressing the set for a scene set in the future…the distant future.


  17. JohnMo says:

    “For some reason Danny becomes a stereotypical East Coast Jew in his old age.”

    Exactly what I was thinking!! Also, I happened to watch another dream sequence Full House episode last night, and I was thinking, what the hell were those other 2 doing while the daydream was going on? I actually said it out loud, too funny!


  18. Laney says:

    Loving your blog. Don’t anyone get mad but I just want to say that “Dads” doesn’t usually need to be “Dad’s” with an apostrophe. Just “Dads”, no apostrophe. Just pointing it out, no one kill me. Again, LOVING this blog!!!


  19. Laney says:

    Ok, I see someone else said something earlier. The one time I don’t read through all the comments. Oh well!


  20. Megan says:

    wow they made the future Kimmy hot. i guess Kimmy would be a woman 1 day and turn out as a major babe.


  21. Bekah says:

    The Kimmie Gibbler part of the dream thing is really messed up when you think about it. Basically he’s fantasizing about his daughter’s best friend who grows up to be all sexy and stuff. It makes it really pedo-ish.


  22. Ashley says:

    I think it’s pretty messed up that they are day dreaming about how hot Kimmy is going to get when she is only 12.


  23. John Q says:

    This is such a disturbing episode on so many levels.

    First of all it displays the horrible parenting skills of Danny and the boys in that there are no set boundaries in this house whatsoever. What’s the deal, those girls just arbitrarily set the rules and Danny and the other two are compelled to obey their commands?? And the weird thing is that the only thing they’re upset about is that nobody said “thanks” rather than ponder for a second that they’re raising a bunch of spoiled, self-absorbed, narcissistic, self-entitled brat daughters.

    And Joey’s vague role in this household is magnified in this episode. Seriously what’s he doing there anyway?? Why is he spending all this money on Stephanie’s camera and film?? Why would he assume parental responsibilities anyway?? I can’t even fathom that I would move into my friend’s basement and help him raise his children if his wife died. It really looks like they wanted Danny and Joey to be a gay couple but they weren’t allowed to because of the mores of the time period.

    A couple of thoughts on the dream sequence:

    Why is a Danny a 75 year old Jewish man from Brooklyn in the future?

    The adults aged 40 years and the girls only aged 20 years? And it’s odd that they used adult actresses rather than have the kids dress up as adults. Usually in these dream sequences the kids just dress and act as adults.

    A really disturbing point is that future Kimmy chastises the men for not being nice to her when she was 12 because she’s way hot now. There’s an implication that she won’t have sex with them in the future because they were mean to her when she was 12??? WTF?? So Danny is lamenting the fact that he can’t have sex with his 12 year daughter’s friend in the future??? WTF?

    Another disturbing point that someone brought up is that Dave Coullier impregnated and later married the actress who played Adult Michelle shortly after filming this episode.

    This show is so damn cheap that they didn’t even spend money on props and set design to at least make it look like sometime in the future. It looks exactly like 1989-1990 yet it’s supposed to be 40 years in the future?

    And really the lesson that should be learned after the dream sequence is that there needs to be defined boundaries in this house where the adults actually act like adults and that they don’t behave as enablers and bend over backwards to fulfill every wish or desire from these girls.

    The actress who played “adult Stephanie” was Julie Montgomery who is probably best known for playing the cheerleader Betty Childs in “Revenge of the Nerds”.


    • LORIMAR-Telepictures says:

      They probably had a limited budget at this point of the series. The show’s budget later ballooned to the point where ABC had to cancel the show.


    • Bridget says:

      John Q, it is disturbing these children have no boundaries and can do whatever they want! I studied diseases in my college at home class and one chapter talked about child neglect. Neglectful parents don’t keep an eye on their children like these guys don’t with Michelle (i.e., Michelle was able to fill up a bubble bath all by herself and bathe her fish). She could have fallen into the tub and drowned! I think of Veruca Salt and how spoiled she was in “Charlie & the Chocolate Factory” when the girls act like entitled monsters. As for future Kimmy, any grown man who regrets that he can’t have sex with his daughter’s friend is sick! As for Danny acting like a 75-year-old Jewish guy, well, Bob Saget is Jewish in real life and maybe he was imitating what he saw in his life with his male relatives or something.


  24. Odotry says:

    Hold on a second, Danny is imagining that scenario (he’s not dreaming it up). So he’s imagining Kimmy Gibler as an attractive adult that he wants to bang. Umm, what? 0_o So Danny’s a pedophile as well as a douche?

    All the dads have to do is say NO and not cater to every one of their whims, also punishing them and not enforcing stupid behavior would really help. Ragyou Kiryuin is a better parent than Danny Tanner.


  25. Stacy Hirsh says:

    I always thought the daydream sequence of Danny, Jessie and Joey being like 80 years old but the girls are probably in their 20’s, strange.


  26. Liz says:

    Totally forgot about this episode. I always assumed Danny had sick fantasies to bang Kimmie Gibbler so yeah… Methinks Dan is a pedophile


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